My photo
I love Jesus more than life, and I mean that. I have been entrusted by God with an amazing family. A husband who I am madly in love with and our three kids! My main goal in raising them is that they will grow to know Jesus, love Him and care about the burdens of His heart.

Saturday, August 28, 2010

Life is like a mortar and pestle

I got to go to parts of the Glory of Intercession conference last weekend at IHOP Atlanta. As I mentioned in the previous post, my heart was heavy and I wasn’t “feeling it”. I went anyway because besides knowing I needed it, I had already paid. The first service in, Corey Russell was talking about how we have to get our minds set on heavenly things.
Often what God does for me or says to me is not what is going on corporately. I remember a few verses really stood out to me amid other topics that were being taught on. I kept hearing Colossians 3:1 "Set your mind on things above where Christ is seated". It struck me as he mentioned when the disciples asked him how to pray, Jesus immediately responded with “our father in heaven YOUR name is holy!” It was as though the Holy Spirit was highlighting to me come up here.




I went feeling overwhelmed, stressed, strained and pretty well maxed out emotionally. Billy Humphrey got up and started making some declarations in the spirit. Two things he said that seemed to break the delicately balanced emotional wall I was trying hard to maintain were; that the season of widowhood was over and a bruised reed he would not crush, but that in fact he would blow on that reed until it was set ablaze.



At those declarations, I lost it. So I said, Ok Lord, You keep saying “come up here” where YOU are. What is it that I’m supposed to see? I imagined that I was with God as a friend and we were looking down together on my kids and me. Then the image of this little mortar and pestle I have popped into my head. I know that you use this in cooking, among other things. I looked up the words and in the Latin; the mortar is the “receptacle for pounding" and the pestle means “pounder”. So there we are… me the mortar and God, life, the enemy… the “pounder”. The only time I have ever seen one used was by Scott in the kitchen while making pesto. You place the herb and then crush it, releasing the fragrance and flavor; after it is crushed you add olive oil to it. When I saw this image while at IHOP, I knew what God was saying. I felt like God was asking if I would agree with His heart in the crushing process. I also felt like He said He would release the aroma of Christ through this very crushing. All of life in this earthly tent is about perspective. His is the only perspective that matters, so I want to know what He is doing!



To know that God sees me and hears my cry changes everything. To know that I am not forgotten. To know that these pains will produce the aroma of Christ. To know that momentary and light affliction is producing a weight of glory far beyond comparison. To know that I can partner with and agree with the heart of God on this matter of crushing. YES JESUS! Always YES.



I can’t describe the weight that lifted (the weight lifted far before the puffy eyes went down). Day two at the conference, I had the kids with me all day. Many things didn’t go right. I didn’t get to hear the majority of the morning service because Simeon was terrified of a screaming kid in childcare area. They took a short late nap, which caused me to miss the afternoon service. We had to leave before night service preaching started. I felt like the happiest, most optimistic person though! I got to dance with my kids in worship and my heart was alive and the kids were really great!



I pray that I can walk in the Spirit often enough to really know God is always for me. My circumstances or emotions at any given time are unreliable. He is good, He is God. He has a plan to bring His kingdom to the earth and is looking for people through whom He can work. I believe He loves me and will use the least measure necessary to get the results of sanctification in my life. I will agree with His heart over this life.



I pray that you will set your mind on things above and see your life and circumstances from His perspective and find there is fullness of joy in His presence forever (Psalm 16:11).

1 comment:

Between You and Me said...

you are a testimony of God's goodness and faithfulness.

...such a beautiful work of his hands.