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I love Jesus more than life, and I mean that. I have been entrusted by God with an amazing family. A husband who I am madly in love with and our three kids! My main goal in raising them is that they will grow to know Jesus, love Him and care about the burdens of His heart.

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

He Restores

I have found myself thinking about Scott a lot lately. I expect to miss him more around some significant dates or events, but this time... I just miss him. Seriously, sauteing vegetables made me think of him and opened a floodgate? When I put things like this out there for anyone to see, I feel slightly vulnerable. I keep thinking of how interested, especially in the beginning, I was of how other people in my circumstances were at different stages in their grief journey. I guess I felt like it could be a map to show where some had gone, or to validate where I was or how I felt. Although grief is completely different for every person, I still write with the hope that someone who IS in my circumstances will benefit. My biggest hope is that they would be encouraged to lean into the Lord and not away from Him.



With these images and memories playing in my mind more these last few days; it is a mixed blessing. It exposes the wound, but surely brings healing to a certain degree too. Although there is pain, I know joy comes in the morning. When I call out to Him, He responds. When I cry, He collects my tears. When my heart is broken, He is the balm that heals. So Lord, I thank You for the mixed blessings of pain that accompanies sweet memories, because in it, I find You everywhere I look. I believe He makes all things work together for my good. I know He heals and restores.



I can't help but think that this song posted below is so appropriate for so many. We often walk around with wounded hearts that are heavy with disappointment. Many times in my life before this, things didn't turn out the way I thought they would. Now that I am not in a position to run to something else to distract and temporarily fill, I find Him restoring. I pray that if there are any areas in your life that you have been diligently protecting from God and yourself, that they would be revealed. Those things that pain your heart when you think of them, but seem best just left alone. I really think everytime I hear this song, He restores just a little more and He heals just a little deeper. I hope it's the same for you.



This song is called Restoration. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7LcyQOLVS_U

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